Monday, September 04, 2006

What Does Life Mean?

Meaningless. It's all meaningless. That's what Solomon said in Ecclesiastes. One man works hard, saves his money his whole life. In the end, he dies. He can't buy life. So what does his life mean? I can't help but feel hollow thinking of living my life for money. What I would have to sacrifice to achieve great wealth? Can money love, encourage, or simply give company when I'm lonely?

If I'm not living for money, what am I living for? Wealth can be measured in more than money. While money has some appeal, I am more drawn to pleasure. A person doesn't have to be wealthy to indulge in pleasure, either. I can hang out with my friends for no cost and have a great time. Lately, I've found I will choose to have fun with my friends when I shouldn't. I short myself on sleep. Laundy is left unwashed. Obligations are forgotten. Is this really what life is about? When I get to the end of my life, will I be satisfied that I had a good time?

There are so many pulls on my life. Do this, go here, buy that. The commercials always show beautiful people completely satisfied. I guess ugly fat people who are miseralbe don't inspire people to go for a product. How do I get to be good looking and happy instead of fat and miserable?

I woke up this morning with a bad taste in my gut. I had a whole day in front of my to use however I wanted. Problem was I wanted to save it, not waste it. As I hemmed and hawed deciding how to best take advantage of my day, half of it slipped away. I wanted to what I would most enjoy and now half of it has been used for nothing. I wish I could say that is only true of today. However, I see that I have lived my whole life this way.

What is the meaning of my life? The question Solomon asked. The question The Hitchhiker's Guide to the Galaxy had fun with. With all the resources available to help people find the answer, you'd think this question would have been answered. Maybe my problem isn't in finding the answer, but in finally deciding to live it. I read a quote that goes something like this, "Life was meant to be spent, not saved." This quote has haunted me since I read it. I think because I know I have been trying to save my life. Today, I am deciding to spend my life on something. Not something that will leave me hollow in the end like money or pleasure. I want to my life to mean something to somebody. I want to make a difference in this world. Jesus said, "Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men." I hear him saying, "Follow me, and I will give your life meaning."